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Beautiful Solitude

Updated: Apr 9, 2020

It's interesting what social isolation does to your mind don't you think? The journey's you are taken on both in your dreams and your waking thoughts. Mine is a household of four - three boys aged 16, 11 &10 and me their mum. But I don't think any of us are particularly unhappy.

For now my boys are content watching box set after box set, hanging out in the garden, mooching around, reading the odd book and playing computer games. They are even occasionally washing up in between asking me what their next meal is.

In some ways it's a relief as I have always felt an almost constant guilt about not being a more exciting mum, struggling to take my kids out as often as I should especially in the holidays. I used to take them all over the place - galleries, farms, the countryside, restaurants, but as the years pass, the inspiration fades, particularly as the kids get older and they all want to do different things.

Being frequently met with an almost universal "Noooo" even when I dared suggest an outing starts to give you a sort of agoraphobia after a while. My oldest son helpfully said to me once that he was sorry (on all of their behalf's), and it wasn't that they didn't appreciate my efforts, but that boys are just lazy. Anyway, now the feeling of guilt is replaced with a wonderfully relaxed feeling since we can't go anywhere anyway.

Maybe there is something to be said for isolation anyway, because now when I do suggest a bike ride or a walk to the shops, almost always at least one of them says yes. Perhaps after months of this I will have three highly motivated boys who are planning exciting family trips for us all. Ha ha!

As for me, I am used to my solitude, going to the shop and doing school pickups was the old version of my everyday life anyway. The toughest thing might have been having my space invaded by my three boys full time but in fact that is more special than anything. How often does one get the chance to spend so much quality time with your kids?

Let time and space take your mind on a brand new journey into the future.


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